The Naked Chicken Chalupa paired with AZ Beers

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Back during the 2015 holiday season I wrote a blog post in which I paired Arizona craft beers with the grossest, loneliest fast foods. It was a great article and we all had a solid laugh at how hilariously fat The Classy Alcoholic was and then we moved on to welcome 2016 with open arms ‘cause we just knew that was gonna be our fuckin’ year, man! But as proud as I am of the article I have to admit the experience changed something inside of me. And I’m not just talking about how I now have to submit annual reports to the government to ensure my bowels don’t violate the Chemical Weapons Convention treaty.

No, I’m talking about the existential pain caused by several long nights spent guzzling soggy clumps of deep fried cardboard only vaguely disguised as edible material into my face like a sad opossum that somehow developed both a drinking problem and an impeccable fashion sense. That’s when I realized The Classy Alcoholic had hit rock bottom…

But it’s 2017 now and after 16 months or so of exponential sadness and shame, as well as multiple breakups with my ex-girlfriend Rosario Vargas, I’ve come to realize that that shit was pretty much just rock middle at best. So when Taco Bell released something called a Naked Chicken Chalupa in January using a folded up fried chicken patty instead of a taco shell I decided to quietly suffocate any self-respect I had left under a pillow and then follow up that initial fast food article with a goddamn sequel!

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The Drunk Knight – Part 3

It’s all starting to come together in Part 3 of my 4-part story, “The Drunk Knight.” The Classy Alcoholic and his team head to Flagstaff to discover the full scope of the villain’s evil plan. Check out the “Short Stories” tab on the menu above or just click on the “Continue Reading” link below to follow along on my adventure!

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Wanderlust Brewing Co. – Flagstaff, AZ

Located at 1519 N Main St #102, Flagstaff, AZ 86004
Open Weds 4p-9p; Sat 2p-8p
http://www.wanderlustbrewing.com

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I find the term “Wanderlust” to be a bit complicated. On the one hand it evokes a sense of exploration and adventure. It’s undoubtedly positive to want to travel, learn more about the world around you and expand your life experiences. But I’ll admit that sometimes my desire to travel through Arizona finding new breweries and wineries can come from a need to run away from something rather than running toward something. I decided that a trip to Wanderlust Brewing Company in Flagstaff was necessary in order to find out what “wanderlust” really meant to me.

Downtown Flagstaff is probably my favorite spot to hang out in of all the places I’ve been to in Arizona so far. There are an endless number of options for food and drink and I’m hard-pressed to find reasons to venture outside it. But you’ll have to hop into a car and head east of downtown for about ten minutes in order to get to Wanderlust Brewing. The brewery is in a small, unassuming business park just off the beaten path.

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Mother Road Brewing Co. – Flagstaff, AZ

Located at 7 S. Mikes Pike St, Flagstaff, AZ 86001
Open Mon-Thurs 3p-8p; Fri 3p-9p; Sat 12p-9p; Sun 12p-8p
http://www.motherroadbeer.com

The term “Mother Road” is a nickname given to U.S. Route 66, the famous highway that stretches from Chicago to Los Angeles. Route 66 is historically significant because it ran through several rural towns which gave farmers in the early 1900s an easier way to distribute their produce. Plus the road was a huge boon to the U.S. trucking industry in the 30s, right around the time it started being a popular alternative to transporting goods via railroads. And if that wasn’t enough the highway was also the route taken by hundreds of thousands of people heading west to escape the U.S. Dust Bowl in the 30s.

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Historic Brewing Company – Flagstaff, AZ

Located at 4366 E Huntington Dr, Flagstaff, AZ 86004
Open Wed-Fri 4p-9p; Sat & Sun 2p-7p
http://www.historicbrewingcompany.com

The last time we talked about Flagstaff we didn’t stray far from downtown and the two places I visited were just a few minutes walking distance away from each other. Today we’re taking Route 66 and heading about ten-to-fifteen minutes east of downtown to find a place called Historic Brewing Company. Don’t be afraid when the activity starts to die down and you find yourself crossing train tracks and wandering into an industrial park. You’re in the right place.

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Beaver Street Brewery & Lumberyard Brewing Co. – Flagstaff, AZ

Beaver Street is open Sun-Wed 11a -1a and Thurs-Sat 11a-2a
Located at 11 South Beaver Street #1, Flagstaff, AZ 86001
http://www.beaverstreetbrewery.com

Lumberyard is open Sun-Tues 11a-11p and Weds-Sat 11a-2a
5 South San Francisco Street, Flagstaff, AZ 86001
http://www.lumberyardbrewingcompany.com

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Flagstaff is the most un-Arizona place in Arizona that we’ve been to so far. The drive in to town is accentuated by pine trees, and if you don’t think it’s weird to see green trees in the Arizona desert then you’ll definitely be blown away by the sight of snowy mountains off in the distance. Historic downtown Flagstaff is home to four breweries and two more can be found by driving 10 to 15 minutes east on Route 66. We’ll talk about those two some other time though because today we’re sticking to downtown. For the first time in the blog’s history we’re talking about two locations in one post. I know that seems like cheating but like I’ve told many an ex-girlfriend before: it’s not cheating because they’re related, baby.

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