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The Drunk Knight – The Final Chapter

July 18, 2016February 23, 2017 The Classy Alcoholic Beer, Microbrewery, Northern Arizona, Williams

The final chapter of my story, “The Drunk Knight,” is here! As always, you can click on the “Short Stories” tab in the menu above or just click the “Continue Reading” link below to check it out.

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Tucson & Marana, THIS IS NOT A DRILL. An @8bitaleworks keg is on tap at @capscorksaz right now (thanks to me making the connection there but I’m not here to brag)! Now you don’t have to drive all the way out to Avondale, AZ to get your hands on the Legend of Zymur DIPA. Not only is it a great beer but all you turds who love to complain about there being too many hazy IPAs can pat yourselves on the back all you want for drinking something translucent, which is a weird flex but okay! Go get this beer! (First photo copied from the Caps & Corks IG account.)

Happy 4th birthday to @8bitaleworks! I got to hang out with @margarite_nicole yesterday and try a few rotating infusions throughout the afternoon. This place is definitely one of the best breweries in Arizona so if you haven’t been, what the hell are you waiting for? I know you’re all watching your dumb show about tits and dragons today but you can make time to head to Avondale and check out this awesome place!

Hi, @abnormalbeerco! Thanks for coming out to Arizona. My buddy @mr_bleu_sky here from @quailcanfly is rocking out with a few of the cans that are for sale now throughout the state. We hung out at @craftdrinkery in Tucson where I got to pick up a few cans and try a glass of the Cherry Cherry Coupe, a fucking awesome imperial porter with cherries, vanilla and cacao nibs. It’s one of the very few kegs that made it to the state so make sure you get your hands on it before it disappears. #abnormalbeerco

Muchas gracias a mis amigos de @buquibichu Brewing en Hermosillo por compartir la primera cerveza que enlataron esta semana: la Banquetera kolsch. Era la primera vez que visité esta ciudad y tuve la suerte de participar en el @festivaldelchef_sonora, uno de los mejores festivales al que he asistido. Gracias a mi amigo Eric de @dillingerbrewingco por invitarme. Vamos al Festival del Chef (Festival del Chef!) otra vez el próximo año!

Loving these baby cans of Naughty As Can Be, a 12% ABV (!!!) sour gose from @1912brewing in Tucson. If I drank all four of them at once does that make it 48% ABV? I get that they’re tiny because you’re only supposed to drink eight ounces but come on, that’s like eating just one pistachio.

(Screenshat from Twitter) Look, there’s nothing wrong with giving props to a joint you like and that has great customer service. But to frame this as something that needs to be said because 10 Barrel is constantly getting dunked on by craft beer drinkers is fucking dumb. If there’s one thing a brewery owned by a company that can afford Super Bowl commercials ISN’T hurting for it’s for you to take time and sing their praises. They’re good. They’ve got Budweiser Fuck You money. They don’t need you. When I read this all I could think about was my podcast interview with @along1, the co-owner of @dillingerbrewingco in Tucson. He told me how he singlehandedly delivers Dillinger kegs and cans all throughout Phoenix and Tucson after stuffing them in the back of his Kia. Just one guy in a regular degular car does this for the business but sure, let’s make sure we highlight that poor company that only made a meager $54.6 BILLION in 2018. Fuck that. I mean, drink what you wanna drink. I’m not trying to convince you to stop buying AB products or to start talking shit about them on social media. I’m asking you to think about the small businesses in our own community that could actually use the publicity. There are so many places where a simple recommendation from you could turn into a new customer. And every single new customer is a win.

If you’re thinking to yourself, “Man, I hope I don’t have to listen to The Classy Alcoholic’s stupid fat voice ever again” then today is the worst day of your fucking life. Because I took over hosting duties of the @tapthatazpodcast for an episode while the regular host Eric Walters was in jail. I spoke to my buddy Aaron, co-owner of @Dillingerbrewingco in Tucson. We had fun chatting about the business, the beers and just whatever else came to mind. Go download it on iTunes or whatever android people use to download podcasts and make sure to pick up Dillinger beer wherever fine craft is sold.

@thesanecatlady is the best hair stylist anyone could ever ask for. Yes, my hair is naturally beautiful as you all well know. But even a Ferrari needs a tune up. And I wouldn’t trust just anyone with something as important as my hair. I got to hang out with her and @smokeeater86 in Bisbee while she was celebrating her birthday. We closed out the night at St. Elmo’s Bar where I scored a pair of crotchless panties and a vibrator from their claw machine. Because Bisbee knows how to party.

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